So, I finally get baby to fall asleep before midnight. The logical thing for me to do would be to take advantage of the situation and go to bed. And so here I am.
I've had a couple of power struggle moments with Bee in the last few days that have ended badly (read: a ten minute time-out one day, and a wailing child alone in the bathroom because she refused to do what she needed to there the next day). She's been a terror since her brother was born. The fact that I know that this is normal, developmentally appropriate behavior doesn't make it any better. The testing of limits she is doing is exhausting to me! Though my patience has developed to levels I never expected pre-children.
Toddlers are teenagers without the hormones and knowledge of the world that lets them make life-altering, at times poor decisions. In the light of Bee's recent rebellion, two experiences from the last few days have scared me to death.
I recently learned that two different but very dear teenagers in my life 1) have HPV and 2) bought cigarettes though not old enough to do so legally. I rather expected the first but was floored by the second.
I know that I can't "keep" my kids from making similar decisions. The decisions are theirs to make. I also know that there are certain things that I can do to help them choose good things on their own. My worry is actually based on my potential reaction to their choosing potentially destructive things. Will I be able to help them recover? I mean, I've seen firsthand that reacting the wrong way when your child screws up can help them justify further screwing up.
Any thoughts, anyone?
And, isn't it appropriate and revelatory that I'm worrying about this, given that neither of my children is even in school yet? Oh, what it's like to be a constant worry-er. :-)
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Child...!
So, I've been having an interesting 36 hours. For several reasons.
Our dryer, which I rely on to be able to use our cloth diapers (the brand/design they are won't line-dry fast enough for us to survive on the dozen we can afford...so I need the dryer!) stopped working mid-laundry day yesterday. Fortunately my dear friend Jen saved me this morning and is letting me dry all the wet things (the load from the dryer that didn't get done because it broke, the load from the washer that was next in line, and the diapers that were dirty that I'm washing now) at her house. As though that isn't totally stellar enough, she's going to let me steal her dryer when she moves next week! Which is a godsend (should that be capitalized?)for us. So though that resolved pretty phenomenally, it did create considerable stress.
Aside from that, I've also been dealing with some postpartum and starting birth control issues....which girls can imagine, and boys don't want to hear about. So I'll leave it at mentioning that for the last day or so pretty much everything has set me off and I'm trying hard to manage those emotions.
So (to the point of the post...but you need the context of my two traumas to know why I reacted the way I did!), today while Bee was playing at a friend's house, they had gotten into swimsuits to play in some water in the back yard. Come time to go, I needed to get her back into her real clothes so we could walk home. After each piece of clothing, she would walk away and I had to get her to come back. After repeating the process for panties and shorts, I told her to come back to get her shirt on. She came over and I started into a "you need to just come over and stay put until you're dressed" lecture. But I started off with an exasperated "Child...!" Before I could say anything else she said "of God?" Yeah. Can you spell guilt trip? I can. :-)
Our dryer, which I rely on to be able to use our cloth diapers (the brand/design they are won't line-dry fast enough for us to survive on the dozen we can afford...so I need the dryer!) stopped working mid-laundry day yesterday. Fortunately my dear friend Jen saved me this morning and is letting me dry all the wet things (the load from the dryer that didn't get done because it broke, the load from the washer that was next in line, and the diapers that were dirty that I'm washing now) at her house. As though that isn't totally stellar enough, she's going to let me steal her dryer when she moves next week! Which is a godsend (should that be capitalized?)for us. So though that resolved pretty phenomenally, it did create considerable stress.
Aside from that, I've also been dealing with some postpartum and starting birth control issues....which girls can imagine, and boys don't want to hear about. So I'll leave it at mentioning that for the last day or so pretty much everything has set me off and I'm trying hard to manage those emotions.
So (to the point of the post...but you need the context of my two traumas to know why I reacted the way I did!), today while Bee was playing at a friend's house, they had gotten into swimsuits to play in some water in the back yard. Come time to go, I needed to get her back into her real clothes so we could walk home. After each piece of clothing, she would walk away and I had to get her to come back. After repeating the process for panties and shorts, I told her to come back to get her shirt on. She came over and I started into a "you need to just come over and stay put until you're dressed" lecture. But I started off with an exasperated "Child...!" Before I could say anything else she said "of God?" Yeah. Can you spell guilt trip? I can. :-)
Friday, June 5, 2009
Things I love....
...about coming home to Ohio. I'm going to make a list.
1) Going to Gran's house to sew (we made a great dress for Bee this time)
2) Watching Bee play in the creek under the bridge
3) When my cell phone loses service as we drive down the lane into the valley
4) Taking off my sunglasses on the lane because there are so many trees I don't need them
5) Going over to T's house to listen to music, love her flowers, and talk
6) T's kids taking care of Bee and making her feel special
7) Watching everyone notice how round Baby's face has gotten
8) Helping out where I can wherever I am
9) Watching Numb3rs with the crowd at T's house
10) Familiar food (Ben points out that it is also free)
11) When Brendan shakes his hands like Gran
12) Looking at Colleen's quilts (a girl after my own heart!)
13) Seeing my Dad hold my babies
14) The community of women that is my family (we let the boys and the husbands hang out too)
15) Going to church in my home ward (even though I hardly know anyone any more)
16) People who love me, people I love
17) All the ANIMALS that Bee gets to watch in the Valley
18) Staying up late with EVERYONE!
19) Sleeping in
20) Watching how much all the cousins change, and grow, and love each other
There are more, but it's time to get kiddos settled. I LOVE to come home to Ohio. I wish
1) Going to Gran's house to sew (we made a great dress for Bee this time)
2) Watching Bee play in the creek under the bridge
3) When my cell phone loses service as we drive down the lane into the valley
4) Taking off my sunglasses on the lane because there are so many trees I don't need them
5) Going over to T's house to listen to music, love her flowers, and talk
6) T's kids taking care of Bee and making her feel special
7) Watching everyone notice how round Baby's face has gotten
8) Helping out where I can wherever I am
9) Watching Numb3rs with the crowd at T's house
10) Familiar food (Ben points out that it is also free)
11) When Brendan shakes his hands like Gran
12) Looking at Colleen's quilts (a girl after my own heart!)
13) Seeing my Dad hold my babies
14) The community of women that is my family (we let the boys and the husbands hang out too)
15) Going to church in my home ward (even though I hardly know anyone any more)
16) People who love me, people I love
17) All the ANIMALS that Bee gets to watch in the Valley
18) Staying up late with EVERYONE!
19) Sleeping in
20) Watching how much all the cousins change, and grow, and love each other
There are more, but it's time to get kiddos settled. I LOVE to come home to Ohio. I wish
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